Say What?

Out of the mouths of Miriams:

"Mommy, will you be my toilet paper?"
[by which, of course, she means toilet paper holder]

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Mrs. P: Hey Miriam, Mrs. Adele had her baby!
Miriam: Ah! She did?! ...How did she push the baby out?
Mrs. P, confused: Ummmm, well, what do you think? [classic parental stalling answer]
Miriam: Did she push it out the hole in the middle?
Mrs. P, thinking this a perfect opportunity for a little sex ed.: Yes, and what it that called?
Miriam, thinking: Ummmm, Eucharist?
Mr. and Mrs. P: Bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!

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Scene: driving in the car.
Miriam: Ooh, Mommy, look, a convertible!!! [suddenly very quiet and thoughtful] How do you get a convertible?
Mrs. P: Well, you go to a car store, and you give them a LOT of money, and they give you a new convertible.
Miriam, again thoughtful; then: Daddy says he has a lot of money in the bank!!
Mrs. P: Ha ha, not that much.