Miriam just handed me a toy ladder from her Little People fire truck and asked me to sing "keen and bwight fowevew," meaning of course that she wants me to sing Edelweiss from the Sound of Music, pretending that the ladder is my guitar. In the past she has also pretended that her popcorn pusher is her guitar. I miss having an imagination like that!
Okay, another 10 points to the person who can tell us which song this line is supposed to be from: "My sun shoo be like a diet." She informs us that it's from the Sound of Music (well, "Kids Movie" anyway), but we can't figure out what it's supposed to mean. Does anyone else speak Toddler?
Wednesday, October 27, 2004
Tuesday, October 26, 2004
Lookadat Baby Belly!
Wednesday, October 20, 2004
Lessons we’ve learned while doing home improvements
Lesson #1 – Home improvement projects ALWAYS take longer than you expect.
This is no surprise to anyone who’s ever attempted to do anything worth doing. There is always something that goes horribly, drastically wrong and sets you back. The Picklesbane was the wallpaper in the bathroom (see “Diary of a Bathroom”). We were supposed to have all painting and decorating projects done by the end of summer – we just finished last week.
Lesson #2 – You’ll hear your spouse using words you didn’t even know they KNEW.
Like when Mr. Pickles stepped on a sharp edge of an old light fixture – in his bare feet – twice. Mrs. Pickles followed him up the stairs with a wet rag, mopping up the trail of blood he left on the carpet. (The gash is STILL healing.)
Lesson #3 – We have come to associate painting with nursery rhymes.
To keep Miriam occupied while we were painting, we would play CD’s of kid music. One day while Mrs. Pickles was painting a wall in the bathroom, she found herself humming things like, “Ollie Mae the Octopus, we love you, yes we dooooo....” and “Down by the bayyyyyyy, where the watermelons growwwwww...” even though there wasn’t anything playing on the stereo.
Lesson #4 – The man who invented curtain rod brackets is probably spending a lot of time in purgatory. Or at least he ought to be.
Ours seem to be designed so that the hook wherein the rod rests obscures the screws holding the bracket to the wall, making the task of putting in screws a job worthy of Sisyphus (i.e. a job seemingly impossible to complete). The only way to get them in was to use a ratchet set and a lot of patience.
Lesson #5 – In tight quarters, surrounded by walls with wet paint, bending over can be quite precarious.
Let’s just say that Mr. Pickles has some shorts he won’t be wearing in public again.
Lesson #6 – As Click & Clack the Car Talk Guys say, every project is an opportunity to buy a new tool.
Well, Mr. Pickles didn’t actually get the power sander he was eyeing (to sand more easily the spackling we applied over the gouges in the sheetrock that appeared while removing the !@#$%^&* wallpaper in the Picklesbane bathroom), but he did get to play with a lot of his big boy toys when doing things like removing the toilet tank, moving the bathroom sink, hanging curtain rods, and removing and replacing the old bathroom hardware. (The most complicated thing Mrs. Pickles got to handle was a Phillips head screwdriver.)
Lesson #7 – When attaching hardware to your bathroom wall, please don’t strip the screws holding them to the hang plate.
Our LOVELY former owners did this, necessitating the use of a hacksaw to remove the towel rings and TP holder. Mr. Pickles got a couple nasty blisters in the process, since he had to scrape his hand against the wall to get the saw close enough.
Lesson #8 – Hacksaws are wonderful tools, but there are times when Mr. Pickles wished he had an acetylene torch for cutting through metal...., or maybe a laser. (Maybe next home improvement project?...)
Lesson #9 – When instructions for installing bathroom hardware tell you that one of the tools you will need is a level, you really WILL need a level.
Line of sight just ain’t quite good enough. (Especially if your floor is crooked.)
Lesson #10 – Any home improvement project will end up costing WAY more than you would ever expect.
I think we’ve pretty much blown our miscellaneous household expenses budget for the rest of the year. And oh yeah, don’t expect any Christmas presents from us either.
This is no surprise to anyone who’s ever attempted to do anything worth doing. There is always something that goes horribly, drastically wrong and sets you back. The Picklesbane was the wallpaper in the bathroom (see “Diary of a Bathroom”). We were supposed to have all painting and decorating projects done by the end of summer – we just finished last week.
Lesson #2 – You’ll hear your spouse using words you didn’t even know they KNEW.
Like when Mr. Pickles stepped on a sharp edge of an old light fixture – in his bare feet – twice. Mrs. Pickles followed him up the stairs with a wet rag, mopping up the trail of blood he left on the carpet. (The gash is STILL healing.)
Lesson #3 – We have come to associate painting with nursery rhymes.
To keep Miriam occupied while we were painting, we would play CD’s of kid music. One day while Mrs. Pickles was painting a wall in the bathroom, she found herself humming things like, “Ollie Mae the Octopus, we love you, yes we dooooo....” and “Down by the bayyyyyyy, where the watermelons growwwwww...” even though there wasn’t anything playing on the stereo.
Lesson #4 – The man who invented curtain rod brackets is probably spending a lot of time in purgatory. Or at least he ought to be.
Ours seem to be designed so that the hook wherein the rod rests obscures the screws holding the bracket to the wall, making the task of putting in screws a job worthy of Sisyphus (i.e. a job seemingly impossible to complete). The only way to get them in was to use a ratchet set and a lot of patience.
Lesson #5 – In tight quarters, surrounded by walls with wet paint, bending over can be quite precarious.
Let’s just say that Mr. Pickles has some shorts he won’t be wearing in public again.
Lesson #6 – As Click & Clack the Car Talk Guys say, every project is an opportunity to buy a new tool.
Well, Mr. Pickles didn’t actually get the power sander he was eyeing (to sand more easily the spackling we applied over the gouges in the sheetrock that appeared while removing the !@#$%^&* wallpaper in the Picklesbane bathroom), but he did get to play with a lot of his big boy toys when doing things like removing the toilet tank, moving the bathroom sink, hanging curtain rods, and removing and replacing the old bathroom hardware. (The most complicated thing Mrs. Pickles got to handle was a Phillips head screwdriver.)
Lesson #7 – When attaching hardware to your bathroom wall, please don’t strip the screws holding them to the hang plate.
Our LOVELY former owners did this, necessitating the use of a hacksaw to remove the towel rings and TP holder. Mr. Pickles got a couple nasty blisters in the process, since he had to scrape his hand against the wall to get the saw close enough.
Lesson #8 – Hacksaws are wonderful tools, but there are times when Mr. Pickles wished he had an acetylene torch for cutting through metal...., or maybe a laser. (Maybe next home improvement project?...)
Lesson #9 – When instructions for installing bathroom hardware tell you that one of the tools you will need is a level, you really WILL need a level.
Line of sight just ain’t quite good enough. (Especially if your floor is crooked.)
Lesson #10 – Any home improvement project will end up costing WAY more than you would ever expect.
I think we’ve pretty much blown our miscellaneous household expenses budget for the rest of the year. And oh yeah, don’t expect any Christmas presents from us either.
The Picklesbane -- before & after
Diary of a Bathroom (aka The Picklesbane)
Week 1 – Aug. 30-Sept. 3
We had just finished the dining room & had our home blessing at the end of August, so we were feeling pretty pumped & ready to finish up the last 2 rooms of the house, the living room and main level half bath, or “powder room”. We spent this week doing prep – removing pictures from the walls, books from the shelves, etc. Walmart was out of a particular dye we needed for the paint, so we decided to tackle the bath first, since that required lots of prep (primarily removing wallpaper). We tried peeling off some wallpaper, thinking it would come off as easily as the paper in the DR, but it clung tenaciously to the wall, the stubborn stuff.
Week 2 – Sept. 6-10
Made a run to Lowe’s (we LOVE Lowe’s – it has something for everyone!) to get THE CLAW™ – a fun, deadly-looking pokey wallpaper-remover thingy that we had hoped to avoid purchasing initially, but oh well. It all seemed so easy:
Step 1 – perforate wallpaper with THE CLAW™.
Step 2 – spray holey wallpaper with blue gooey gel. Let sit for 15 mins, allowing gel to work its adhesive-dissolving magic.
Step 3 – scrape off soggy wallpaper.
Piece of cake!
Right?
BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ – WRONGGG!!!!!!!!!!
It turned out more like this:
Step 1 – run THE CLAW™ over the walls (this was actually fun), everywhere you can reach, except for places like corners, near the ceiling, near the floor – basically within 2 inches of any edge (since the pokey things couldn’t reach that far).
Step 2 – spray wallpaper, ceiling, floor, door, self with sticky blue gooey gel. Allow to dry for 15 mins.
Step 3 – attempt to scrape off now-dry and even stickier wallpaper.
Repeat steps 2 (omitting the waiting part) and 3.
Step 4 – while removing wallpaper, remove large sections of underlying sheetrock as well. Note that some patches resemble a cat, a boot, a small continent.....
Step 5 – curse previous owners and whoever hung the wallpaper.
Step 6 – give up in despair and fix your self a martini.
Step 7 – call around to local army surplus stores and see if they sell hand grenades.
Week 3 – Sept. 13-17
Mrs. Pickles opened the door to the bathroom once or twice, sighed, and shut it again. Instantly imagining the worst case scenario, she had visions of spending a fortune having to replace all the sheetrock in the bathroom, causing her to sink into a home-improvement-project-induced depression. She called Walmart to see if they had the dye in yet. No luck. That certainly didn’t help either.
Week 4 – Sept. 20-24
Mr. Pickles decided to have mercy on Mrs. Pickles and pick up where she left off. He clawed the remainder of the walls and removed most of the rest of the paper (and large chunks of sheetrock as well). He also removed the light fixture (dropping & shattering one of the glass light shields in the process – oh well, guess we get to have a new one that matches!), took off the toilet tank, and loosened the sink cabinet so we could get behind/around those areas more easily. We also ran out of blue gel so we had to get another bottle. Mr. Pickles called Walmart to see if they had gotten the dye in yet. They hadn’t. Kmart also sells DutchBoy paint, so Mrs. Pickles made a quick trip to see if she could get the paint they needed there. After her experience with the customer nonservice there she resolved never to shop at Kmart again. (Mr. Pickles said it’s no wonder so many Kmarts are going out of business.)
Week 5 – Sept. 27-Oct. 3 (the first time we worked through a weekend)
Heartened by Mr. Pickles’s progress, Mrs. Pickles’s depression dissipated and she finished up the last few patches – using tools like pliers, tweezers, and a flat head screwdriver in the process (don’t ask). Then she washed the walls to get the rest of the adhesive off (it is REALLY sticky stuff – we’re wondering if they didn’t use some industrial strength stuff since it is a bathroom). On a roll, she decided to give Walmart one last chance. The manager of Walmart was then informed that he just lost a customer forever because she will NEVER shop there again. Mrs. Pickles next went to Lowe’s and had such a positive experience there. They know how to match paint samples! They know how to work their mixing machines! They know how to speak English! Mr. & Mrs. Pickles decided to buy stock in Lowe’s. Aside from paint Mrs. Pickles also bought the economy size tub o’spackling to patch up all the naked sheetrock. Unfortunately, she chose a rainy day to do it, so the spackling took FOREVER to dry. But once it was all sanded, we put on a coat of primer. Hooray!!! Visible progress! The day after, we applied the first coat of paint. Hooray!!! A yellow bathroom, finally! We celebrated by going out to eat (mostly b/c we were both too exhausted even to THINK about cooking dinner). :)
Week 6 – Oct. 4-Oct. 8
Mrs. Pickles applied the second coat of paint, and after a very creative moment during a bout of insomnia one night, designed and started painting the border accent. (As of today, this is still incomplete, but she doesn’t care anymore. Have we mentioned that by this time Mrs. Pickles was 7 1/2 mos. pregnant and getting decidedly slower?) She cleaned up the mess, Mr. Pickles installed the new light fixture, towel ring, & TP holder, and, *sniff* oh joy, we have a pretty, working bathroom again! Oh frabjous day!
We had just finished the dining room & had our home blessing at the end of August, so we were feeling pretty pumped & ready to finish up the last 2 rooms of the house, the living room and main level half bath, or “powder room”. We spent this week doing prep – removing pictures from the walls, books from the shelves, etc. Walmart was out of a particular dye we needed for the paint, so we decided to tackle the bath first, since that required lots of prep (primarily removing wallpaper). We tried peeling off some wallpaper, thinking it would come off as easily as the paper in the DR, but it clung tenaciously to the wall, the stubborn stuff.
Week 2 – Sept. 6-10
Made a run to Lowe’s (we LOVE Lowe’s – it has something for everyone!) to get THE CLAW™ – a fun, deadly-looking pokey wallpaper-remover thingy that we had hoped to avoid purchasing initially, but oh well. It all seemed so easy:
Step 1 – perforate wallpaper with THE CLAW™.
Step 2 – spray holey wallpaper with blue gooey gel. Let sit for 15 mins, allowing gel to work its adhesive-dissolving magic.
Step 3 – scrape off soggy wallpaper.
Piece of cake!
Right?
BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ – WRONGGG!!!!!!!!!!
It turned out more like this:
Step 1 – run THE CLAW™ over the walls (this was actually fun), everywhere you can reach, except for places like corners, near the ceiling, near the floor – basically within 2 inches of any edge (since the pokey things couldn’t reach that far).
Step 2 – spray wallpaper, ceiling, floor, door, self with sticky blue gooey gel. Allow to dry for 15 mins.
Step 3 – attempt to scrape off now-dry and even stickier wallpaper.
Repeat steps 2 (omitting the waiting part) and 3.
Step 4 – while removing wallpaper, remove large sections of underlying sheetrock as well. Note that some patches resemble a cat, a boot, a small continent.....
Step 5 – curse previous owners and whoever hung the wallpaper.
Step 6 – give up in despair and fix your self a martini.
Step 7 – call around to local army surplus stores and see if they sell hand grenades.
Week 3 – Sept. 13-17
Mrs. Pickles opened the door to the bathroom once or twice, sighed, and shut it again. Instantly imagining the worst case scenario, she had visions of spending a fortune having to replace all the sheetrock in the bathroom, causing her to sink into a home-improvement-project-induced depression. She called Walmart to see if they had the dye in yet. No luck. That certainly didn’t help either.
Week 4 – Sept. 20-24
Mr. Pickles decided to have mercy on Mrs. Pickles and pick up where she left off. He clawed the remainder of the walls and removed most of the rest of the paper (and large chunks of sheetrock as well). He also removed the light fixture (dropping & shattering one of the glass light shields in the process – oh well, guess we get to have a new one that matches!), took off the toilet tank, and loosened the sink cabinet so we could get behind/around those areas more easily. We also ran out of blue gel so we had to get another bottle. Mr. Pickles called Walmart to see if they had gotten the dye in yet. They hadn’t. Kmart also sells DutchBoy paint, so Mrs. Pickles made a quick trip to see if she could get the paint they needed there. After her experience with the customer nonservice there she resolved never to shop at Kmart again. (Mr. Pickles said it’s no wonder so many Kmarts are going out of business.)
Week 5 – Sept. 27-Oct. 3 (the first time we worked through a weekend)
Heartened by Mr. Pickles’s progress, Mrs. Pickles’s depression dissipated and she finished up the last few patches – using tools like pliers, tweezers, and a flat head screwdriver in the process (don’t ask). Then she washed the walls to get the rest of the adhesive off (it is REALLY sticky stuff – we’re wondering if they didn’t use some industrial strength stuff since it is a bathroom). On a roll, she decided to give Walmart one last chance. The manager of Walmart was then informed that he just lost a customer forever because she will NEVER shop there again. Mrs. Pickles next went to Lowe’s and had such a positive experience there. They know how to match paint samples! They know how to work their mixing machines! They know how to speak English! Mr. & Mrs. Pickles decided to buy stock in Lowe’s. Aside from paint Mrs. Pickles also bought the economy size tub o’spackling to patch up all the naked sheetrock. Unfortunately, she chose a rainy day to do it, so the spackling took FOREVER to dry. But once it was all sanded, we put on a coat of primer. Hooray!!! Visible progress! The day after, we applied the first coat of paint. Hooray!!! A yellow bathroom, finally! We celebrated by going out to eat (mostly b/c we were both too exhausted even to THINK about cooking dinner). :)
Week 6 – Oct. 4-Oct. 8
Mrs. Pickles applied the second coat of paint, and after a very creative moment during a bout of insomnia one night, designed and started painting the border accent. (As of today, this is still incomplete, but she doesn’t care anymore. Have we mentioned that by this time Mrs. Pickles was 7 1/2 mos. pregnant and getting decidedly slower?) She cleaned up the mess, Mr. Pickles installed the new light fixture, towel ring, & TP holder, and, *sniff* oh joy, we have a pretty, working bathroom again! Oh frabjous day!
Friday, October 01, 2004
"Are you my mother?"
Our little girl is full of fun, and intelligence. She loves to sing, dance and read. One of Miriam's current favorite stories is “Are You My Mother?” No doubt Grandma Belland is happy about this, as this is book was (I believe) a gift from her, and she has recounted to me stories of when she read the book to her own daughter years ago.
For those of you who are unfamiliar with the general plot, here's a quick summary. (Warning: Spoilers ahead!) Mama bird realizes that her baby bird will soon hatch, and, after hatching, he will undoubtedly be hungry. While away from her nest, Baby bird does hatch, and, to the wonder of the natural universe, he is born with the abilities to walk about and speak in complete sentences. Knowing that he must have a mother, it leaves the nest and searches the surrounding area for her.
The plot thickens as we realize that Baby bird does not know what Mother looks like. Traversing the local area, Baby bird asks a variety of different animals and objects whether or not any of them might be her mother. Some creatures look at Baby bird in surprise, while the objects (such as a boat or the remains of a post-collision Ford Pinto) can't respond at all. This vast array of specimens includes a cow, a chicken, an airplane, and a “"Snort!"”. At the end of the story Baby bird is happily reunited with his mother, joyfully proclaiming, "“You are not a cow. You are not a chicken. You are not an airplane or a Snort!. You are my mother."”
Recently, after chasing Miriam around the house, Greg hid on her. Genevieve would ask, "“Where's daddy?"” as she searched for me. When she finally found me she said, "“Daddy! You are not a tiger. You are not a lion. You are not an elephant. You are not a Kevin (our next door neighbor). You are a Daddy.”
Greg is quite happy that she didn't confuse him for an elephant--as neat as elephants may be. :)
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