How to make a mommy cry

Cut off her baby's curls!

before...  (so fluffy!)

 

after! (yes, that is his brother's toothbrush. anything to keep him from grabbing the scissors!)

*weep weep*

Baby's First Haircut!

Yes.  We already gave Andy his first haircut.  Mr. Pickles had been pestering me for a while about it and I had been resisting  (Mr. P.: "Sooooo, when do you think you'll cut Andy's hair?"  me: "Umm, never?") so for Easter I finally decided to swallow my maternal angst and do it.

who's that shaggy baby?

 Now, I don't know if you've ever cut a five-month-old's hair, but it's not as easy as it sounds.

...Which is saying something.

baby mullet has got to go!

For one thing, they can't sit up yet.  So the haircut has to be done lying down.  Fortunately with help from The Magic Baby In The Mirror and a piece of ribbon, Andrew was entertained long enough for me to snip away.

Wow!  I have ears!  Now, Woman, about those bangs....

I've trimmed the boys' hair enough to sort of know what I'm doing, but it still came out a little funny.  For one thing, I didn't realize how much hair he'd rubbed off directly over his ears until I trimmed the longer sections above them...

aaack!  too short! too short!

Thankfully his smile is so dazzling that you don't notice. :)

dapper dude!

The BEST part about his new haircut?

He gets AWESOME bed-head.

Maybe I should take the metal cars out of his pockets before he steps on the pediatrician's scale.

Okay, so I've probably mentioned before that Daniel is big.  He was born weighing the same amount that all my other kids were at 2 months, so it's no surprise that he would be slightly above the normal curve.  However, he just had his 2 1/2 year check up last week, and the pediatrician was practically freaking out about his weight.  I can't say I blame her.  Check out his stats on the growth chart:

Okay, see that circled red dot?  The one that's on the 5th percentile line for length?  That's his WEIGHT. (40 lbs. -- that's how much Katie weighed LAST YEAR.)  So the pediatrician was asking about his eating habits and activity level, and making recommendations to help him slim down.  She hinted that he was borderline overweight and we should probably be concerned about that.

Now, I know Danny's big.  And heavy.  And tall.  But FAT? 

It's not like he's a Michelin baby or anything.  I mean, he doesn't have rolls.  He is just SOLID.  Future linebacker material.

So I calculated his body mass index: let's see, weight divided by height squared times 703 (how did they come up with this anyway??) equals... 18.02.  I had to find a chart for children, since according to the adult charts he's actually UNDERweight (ha!).  So here is his BMI compared with other boys his age.

Ta-da!  Surprise!  He's totally within normal range.  Still on the big side, but less than 90th percentile.  Whew!  Parenting panic averted. I'm still going to give him low-fat milk (he loves his milk) and try to get him outside to run more often (because it's totally not winter and freezing outside), but at least now I don't have to feel like I'm a bad mother for stuffing my child.  Maybe I'll bring this BMI chart in with me to his next appointment.

Lesson learned: be your own child's health advocate and refuse to be freaked out when your instincts tell you otherwise.

Motherhood gives new meaning to "Multitasking"

It's the only way to survive, really. Otherwise NOTHING would get done, or lots of things that you didn't want to happen would get done, like the toddler running his spaghetti-sauced hands over the couch, or his little brother, because you were too busy nursing to get the washcloth to wipe him off.

So, for the sake of sheer survival, things I have done while nursing:

-loaded the dishwasher
-wiped several sticky hands and faces after meals
-brushed and flossed several sets of teeth that were not my own
-brushed the girls' hair
-eaten half my meals since the baby was born
-applied a bandaid
-hauled the resident toddler back inside the front door
-run to answer the phone
-poured drinks for thirsty small children

*Sigh* Nursing time is no longer that precious sit-down-and-rest time -- it has to fit in with the rest of family life. I know it will get easier once the baby isn't nursing so frequently. It always gets easier. I just wish I had the luxury to really enjoy these moments with Daniel -- he's going to grow out of babyhood so fast. I can't believe he's a month old already.

"So, how was your day?"

he asked.

"Meh," I replied. "I don't feel like I really accomplished anything today," thinking about the sink full of dishes, the unwashed diapers, the boxes of kid clothes in our room that need to be sorted and stored, the religion we didn't do today. "At least I got the breakfast dishes washed up while Miriam had her morning tantrum. We didn't finish breakfast until 10:30."

"Oh," he said. "I'm sorry. Did you get to sleep in or something?"

"No, we just took showers this morning, and that always throws our schedule back.

"...But I did get the kids' summer clothes sorted, and made a color-coded list of the things they'll need to get them through the summer.

"And I read a ton of library books to them while Joseph nursed after his morning nap.

"And we made pretzels today! I guess that was fun.

"We did do some geography -- we learned about Connecticut today.

"And Miriam did spelling, too. Her list was all homophones so we thought of sentences to go with each word to help her remember to correct spelling. That was fun and creative.

"Oh, and Miriam also did a couple pages in her math workbook, and did really well. And Katie learned how to make the letter S in a pan of cornmeal. I also uploaded a bunch of pictures. And we did several loads of laundry, vacuumed the dining room, swept the kitchen, fed and watered the gerbils, and tidied the living room."

"...Sounds like you actually got a lot done!"

"Hm, I guess we did...."

I guess I didn't notice it, because we crammed school in between other homemaking things, instead of having a 3-hour block of "School." Given the option, I kind of prefer today's way. While frustrating in the moment, looking back I believe we were actually more productive -- I just grabbed the girls when I felt they needed a chance of scene (i.e. when they were running up and down the house crashing into things and each other -- it was cold and rainy today) and sat them down to do something more constructive than earn another bandaid or black eye.

Hm, maybe this guerilla homeschooling thing can actually work...

I've also been feeling like less of a mother after reading Elizabeth Foss's delightful blog, particularly about the feast of Eric Carle. :) I know I can never aspire to the level of creativity and beauty in her homeschooling day, but I do hope to make learning in our home a joy. So it's hard when the resident 7-year-old complains "I don't want to do school! School is BORRRRRRRING!" My instantaneous guilt-ridden thought is, what am I doing wrong?? I want to incorporate more hands-on artsy things (like painting) and less busy work (like workbooks) to get a point across. Of course, it's easier to keep a workbook and pencil out of reach of a toddler than an easel filled with paint cans. (Thank heaven for his morning nap.) I also can't wait to get the kids outside more -- now that spring has sprung we can start playing outside in the dirt -- I mean, working in the garden -- and going on walks in our itty bitty woods. I think that's Charlotte Mason's recipe for "text-tired tots," which would be an accurate description.

So, all in all, I guess our day was pretty good... in retrospect. :)

Girl meets fallen world

It was only a matter of time.

One of Miriam's neighborhood friends introduced her to the "I" word. You know, that thing that a boy and a girl do when they're grown up, as Miriam put it. "But I have no idea what she was talking about." I had had a feeling that this was coming -- after all, all the neighborhood kids go to public school where sex ed starts in what, 4th grade? Something ridiculously early.

So Miriam and I sat down and had a little talk. Basically we talked about the wonderfulness of family and the love between a husband and wife, and how the tricksy devil -- remember the Garden of Eden when he lied to Eve? -- wants to take everything beautiful and twist it. I told her I'd let her know more about it when she was a little older and could understand better. She was perfectly content with my explanations and as far as I know hasn't thought twice about it. I also thanked her for confiding in me in the first place -- that really warmed my heart, and made me feel more than anything else that I must be doing something right. If only I can keep that trust, there are so many future problems I won't have to worry about.

On the flipside of this friendship, Miriam may be an avenue of grace herself. The other girl's family is Catholic -- at least they go to Mass at a nearby parish -- but I don't think it goes much beyond that, small blame to them. I'm sure the parents had little faith formation, especially since the mom told me they both came from families that had suffered through messy and painful divorces. Anyway, one Friday when Miriam's friend came over the topic of candy or dessert came up, and Miriam piped up, "Oh, but we don't have dessert today, because it's Friday."
The friend: "Why?"
Miriam: "Because Jesus died on a Friday."
The friend: "So?"
Miriam, with a definite "duh" tone: "So, because he gave His life for us, we give something up for Him."
The friend: "Why?"
Miriam, after thinking a moment: "To make Him happy."
Pause. Then, "Why?"
Miriam was speechless. She couldn't fathom that it would be necessary to explain why someone wouldn't want to make Jesus happy. The idea of Jesus loving us and wanting us to love Him back was such an integral part of her child's faith that she couldn't imagine life any other way. After that pause the conversation moved on to something else, but Mr. Pickles and I kept these things and pondered them in our hearts.

It will be interesting to see what comes of this friendship. I hope and pray that Miriam will receive a gentle exposure to the world outside -- to perceive how different we Catholics really are -- but also that some avenues of grace might be opened to Miriam's friend that she might not otherwise receive. In her own simple way, Miriam is already a little evangelizer.


art credit: "Little Girl with Pray Rock" by Laura Monahan, from Allposters.com

Yet another childhood fantasy goes fffffffft.

I recently finished reading this book to the girls, "Half Magic" by Edward Eager. It's the most hilarious book. (and one of many I pilfer-- I mean, borrowed from the parents' library) Yesterday while the girls were playing in the basement and I was otherwise occupied with Joseph in the living room, Katie came upstairs, found Miriam's wallet, and brought it down. I heard coins clanking on the table downstairs for a while. After a time Miriam came upstairs, sighed heavily, and said, "It just didn't work."
"What didn't work?" I asked.
"Well," she replied, "I wanted to be a baby again, so I got all my coins and tried wishing on them but none of them worked."
"Ah," I said. "No magic talismans in your wallet then?"
"Nope," she said, and sighed again.

Today, she asked me, "Are there any fairies in this world?"
I felt like a murderer when I admitted, "Probably not." (Since you KNOW every time a child says it doesn't believe in fairies anymore, somewhere a fairy drops down dead.)
"Because," with a shy smile, "it would be nice if we had some fairy dust so we could fly."
I felt terrible for killing her hope.
I suppose there's always parasailing. Or hang gliding.

When I'm dead, of course.

Sigh, our baby's growing up!

Miriam just hit another milestone! Last month she went from this:

...an exTREMEly wiggly tooth for WEEKS,

to this:
...a hole in her head!! I took this right after she asked me to yank it out. How do you think she feels about her first lost tooth? :)

Another big milestone was first trip to the hair salon. She's been begging to get her hair cut short for quite a while now -- all her best friends had recently gotten haircuts. But I wasn't ready to let it go yet! Finally I realized how ridiculous I was being -- it's her hair! All she wants is a trim! She's always so hot in the summers anyway, and her hair is so thick. So I finally took her to the local Hair Butchery and sat there while I watched all her pretty golden locks falling to the floor. I wanted to weep -- but then as the stylist dried and brushed and fluffed and actually styled it, it still looked pretty -- and so neat and chic! Miriam LOVES it. I think she really loves how cool she feels. At vacation bible school the next day she told anyone who would listen all about her new haircut.

Before:
After:


A couple days later I also chopped Katie's hair.

Before:

After:

It's not quite as cute as Miriam's -- I started cutting it one way and changed my mind halfway through the haircut -- but after a couple weeks it looks a little less, well, chopped. (You know what they say: the difference between a bad haircut and a good haircut is about two weeks.) :)

I also trimmed some hair from around Joseph's ears, since they had started to disappear. I also had to snip some off his neck, too, since it was almost as long as Miriam's. :) It's amazing how that makes him look a little less babyish and a little more boyish.

Now it's MY turn!

Should I be alarmed...

...that my sweet 5-year-old daughter finds this utterly, gut-laughter-inducing, rotf hilarious?

Our baby's growing up!

(caveat lector: non-parents may want to skip this one)

Yup, it's that time for Katie: that special time of a child's life when the parents are desperate to get them OUT OF DIAPERS ALREADY!!!! (ahem)

As you can see from her sticker collection, it's been quite a success. The collection should be even larger, but the Pickle Parents have been rather lax. The process has actually been kind of funny (in retrospect, of course). Katie was VERY attached to her diapers and was extremely reluctant to give them up. They were like a security blanket for her bottom. She was NOT interested in her brand new, pink, froofy, Big Girl Pants. The difference between our two girls has been amusing. Miriam, you may remember, was willing to walk across hot coals, or at least sit on the potty -- for her the same thing -- to wear her new big girl undies. Katie, on the other hand, was perfectly happy sitting on the pot but wanted nothing to do with the undies. I guess it just goes to show that you have to reinvent the wheel with each child!

I could tell that Katie was ready for toilet training -- she was just lazy. It was much easier to stand in the middle of the living room and play with her puzzle than to stop whatever fun thing she was doing and sit on a toilet and wait until something happened. I went through a lot of parental tricks before I finally found a system of bribery that worked.

We tried talking up the idea of what a big girl she would be if she could use the potty like her big sis, but that didn't seem to hold any attraction for her. She was perfectly happy sitting and reading a stack of books, but she never did anything. She always waited until 2 minutes after we put her diaper back on.

So, we tried Big Girl Pants. She pitched a fit when I suggested putting them on. She flung herself on the floor (her favorite protest position) and begged, with passionate tears, to have her diaper put back on. I told her that if she went to the bathroom, she could have her diaper put back on. (For Miriam, I would threaten to put a diaper back on her if she had an accident.) I think that worked maybe once.

Then I tried leaving off the undies, and just putting a pair of bloomers on her. I mopped up 2 puddles before I gave that up.

Next, I tried putting plastic pants on her to contain any potential mess (we DO have wall-to-wall carpeting, after all) but left the diaper off so she could feel if she had an accident. She happily walked around with a puddle in her plastic pants.

Finally I realized that any sensation of elastic around her middle felt too much like a diaper, so I just took her diaper off and refused to put it back on, and let her run around naked from the waist down (well, under her dresses). She was NOT happy with this, but Mommy was adamant. I decided it was going to be One of Those Things That We Do Regardless of How We Feel About It, like brushing teeth, or going back to bed at 5 am, or letting Mommy buckle her car seat. This worked for a while -- she didn't like making messes on the floor and so was more willing to try to use the potty since Mommy was being so mean about it. But then she decided it really wasn't worth the trouble and I started mopping up puddles again.

FINALLY I resorted to the big guns: what every girl would do ANYTHING for:

a big bowl of chocolate. sitting on top of the toilet. available to any little girl who successfully used the potty.

Wow, did that work.

I really don't understand people who say you shouldn't use bribery to get your child to do something they should be doing anyway. Obviously these people never actually had children.

Long story short, Katie is now officially a big girl, happily wearing big girl pants, and using the potty regularly without any coaxing, reminding, pleading, bribing, or any other form of parental intervention. She'll be playing in the living room, and then I'll hear a little voice singing in the bathroom, and then, "Mom! Mooooooom!" We've long exhausted the supply of chocolate (it would have lasted longer if someone who shall remain nameless didn't keep dipping her hand in the bowl from time to time), and even the application of Dora stickers has lost its appeal (I've still got 3 sheets left!); but very often after a success Katie will say, "My so pwoud of mysewf!" She'll be in diapers at night & naptime for a while yet, but still, this is a huge deal!

*sniff* She's not our baby anymore...