Proof that boys are superfluous...

...at least when it comes to wedding planning. A recent dialogue with Miriam:

Miriam [wearing a blanket on her head]: "Mommy, I'm getting mawwied!"
Mrs. P: "Who are you going to marry?"
Miriam: "I'm getting mawwied so I can dance."
Mrs. P [chuckling]: "Who are you getting married to? Who's the groom?"
Miriam [glancing at the kitchen broom, looking puzzled]: "The bwoom?"
Mrs. P: "No, the Groom. The boy you're going to marry."
Miriam [after pausing a moment]: "I'm going to dance and dance!"

Yes, Miriam is learning early that weddings really are all about the bride -- the groom is just along for the ride. :)

Confessions of a Potterholic

We'll, we've finally done it... we've joined millions of other young types and dived head-first into the Harry Potter books. I just have this to say.....

THESE STORIES ARE SO FREAKIN' AWESOME!!!!!!!

As you can tell, we're really enjoying them. :) I see Mr. Pickles currently has #3 in his lap, underneath his "Data Analysis and Graphics Using R" textbook. I'm guessing he'll pick it up after he finishes reading about regression trees. He says he had a dream the other night that he was helping Harry Potter with his analytic geometry.

Rowling just really knows how to write a good story. If anything, I've got a beef with the way that the students tend to set themselves against the adults. But I guess it's been a while since I was a teenager so I really can't talk. :b It bothered me that the main characters weren't punished for stealing from Prof. Snape in #2 -- I like it better when wrong actions have consequences, no matter how slight. And in #3, Harry stupidly goes out of his way to circumvent the protections placed for his sake, just so he won't feel left out of the fun. Again, maybe that's a generational gap thing. Otherwise I really admire Rowling's treatment of good and evil. Despite the fact that they deal with sorcery, the stories take place in the same moral universe as our own: the main characters, although flawed, are generally good and virtuous and admirable, and the bad characters are despicable and nasty. You know, after having watched The Incredibles, I can't help but notice that all the villains tend to monologue during the climaxes.... Does anyone else find this humorous?

We're just DEVOURING these books. I had to limit myself to only one per week, to make sure that other things got done, like grocery shopping, making dinner, changing diapers... that kind of thing. :) It's so easy to let yourself get totally immersed. I tried limiting myself to only a certain number of pages a day; then I tried to read only during meals and while Miriam was napping. Then I gave up trying to be a good girl and devoured the rest. I feel partly justified in my obsession -- one night I caught Mr. Pickles with the book open on the counter while he was making dinner. :) They really are absorbing. It took me 2 days each to read the first three books -- the fourth book, which is over 700 pages long, 3 days! Alright, I have to admit I DID stay up until 2 or 3 am... (a couple times) -- but I certainly regretted it the day after! (again, the generational gap thing -- can't sleep in until noon on Saturdays anymore, sigh...)

Spring has sprung, the grass is ris, I wonder where the Claritin is?

In less earth-shaking news, it's officially spring here. What makes it official, you ask?
1. Our neighbors turned their air conditioner on a couple weeks ago when it was 60 outside. (they have allergies)
2. One morning while running errands I drove past no fewer than 3 road construction sites within one mile from my house. (Mr. Pickles says in the midwest they call the seasons almost winter, winter, still winter, and road construction)
3. We're ALL sick. Either that or we'll all suffering from allergies. It's hard to tell -- all the symptoms are the same.
But what makes it REALLY official, is:
4. The other day I saw the first bare-chested man of spring! Every year, without fail, as soon as it's above 70, some guy -- usually middle-aged with a hairy beer belly -- will be out doing yard work. It's inevitable, like the rising of the sun, or Congress voting themselves another pay increase.

So now it's official. I'm going to the gardening shop this week to get some seeds for my garden, which is so far only a haven for weeds, forgotten squirrel stashes, a few sad-looking ex-daffodils & all manner of creepy crawlies. That reminds me... I really need to get some gardening gloves.

and so it begins...

from the NY Times today:

GERMAN CARDINAL IS CHOSEN AS POPE
by Ian Fisher
VATICAN CITY, April 19 - Roman Catholic cardinals reached to the church's conservative wing on Tuesday and chose as the 265th pope Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, a seasoned and hard-line German theologian who served as John Paul II's defender of the faith.


Well, I'm happy to hear that the Cardinals reached out to me in deciding, all by themselves, to elect a doctrinaire patriarch who isn't sensitive to the needs of womyn desiring empowerment and others who feel marginalized by his predecessor's conservative personal doctrines... (must... not... laugh....) snort!! snigger giggle...
They really don't get it. Who was it who said that the election was rigged? The Holy Spirit knew all along who was going to be the next pope. It was already in the bag. :)
And as Mr. Pickles says, I wouldn't necessarily consider someone who quotes Teilhard de Chardin as a hard-line conservative, either. I read a nice Op-Ed piece after JPII's death that talked about how he couldn't be absolutely pegged in one camp or another -- things he said made both sides squirm. As the op-ed said, a good teacher makes everyone uncomfortable. I think Pope Benedict will continue to do the same. I look forward to reading his encyclicals -- hopefully something on the liturgy! (since he's already written a book about it, which we have... guess I should read it now!)

Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!

Habemus papam, Benedict XVI!
I'm sure I don't need to stress this to anyone who reads this blog, but Ratzinger is SO awesome! The press is going to have such a heydey with this. Have they discovered yet that the Office Ratzinger was Prefect for, the Sacred Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith, was founded in the 1500's and originally named the Sacred Congregation of the Universal Inquisition? --Thaaaaaaat's right!! Ohhhhh, this is gonna be fun! I sincerely hope that once he settles in, our new Papa will do a little housecleaning. No doubt he already has a lot of enemies. May God bless him with the disarming paternal love of his predecessor.

I think this cartoon about sums up Pope Benedict's position:



I'm sure he'll fit it well.

Miriamisms II

Sorry we hadn't posted in a while -- Mrs. Pickles had the great idea of sewing matching dresses for the girls for Easter, but didn't start working on them until 2 weeks beforehand. She finished just barely in time (and of course forgot to take pictures Easter Sunday morning!), but meanwhile everything else fell by the wayside. But now we're back! And with some great Miriamisms that we actually had the foresight to jot down...

Miriam [holding her My Little Pony baby buggy sideways]: Look Mommy, I'm sewing! [holding out hand] Here you go! Here some cute pants. [aka bloomers] I'm sewing cute pants fo' Daddy!

Mrs. Pickles & the girls went to pick up Mr. Pickles from the train station. Usually when he opens the door Miriam shrieks "DAAAA!" waking up Katie who has usually fallen asleep. But this time...
Miriam: Here you go, Daddy! [hands tissue to Mr. Pickles] Daddy, I got a boogie in it!
Mr. Pickles [falling over laughing]: Um, thank you, Miriam!
Miriam [cheerfully]: You're welcome!

Often on Saturdays Mr. Pickles will mercifully take the girls downstairs so Mrs. Pickles can get a few more precious minutes of sleep. One morning Miriam lined up all the animals from her Noah's Ark set so they faced the window and the rising sun, and had them all sing the Gloria.

Having a child has reinforced for us the genius of the Church in dividing the year into liturgical seasons, and adjusting the liturgy accordingly. Miriam picked up a lot this Lent. One Sunday after we got home from church, Miriam realized with a shock: "Mommy, we didn't sing Alleluia!" During Holy Week, she noticed that the church looked different. She kept asking where Jesus and Mary and St. Joseph went (since they cover all the statues). On Palm Sunday, she was very amused when "the priest got Meenum WET!" during the sprinkling of holy water. Mr. Pickles took her to some of the Triduum services while Mrs. Pickles was laid up with a fever. After Holy Thursday Mass, she kept talking about how the priest "wrapped Jesus up like a baby and took Him away." And on Good Friday she asked where all the candles went. She also wanted to kiss Jesus' owies during the Veneration of the Cross. Her simple piety is so moving. "To such as these..." We didn't take her to the Vigil -- too much too late! -- but maybe next year. By then Katie will be old enough to pay more attention too.

Back to more mundane things...
One day as we were driving past a construction site, Mrs. Pickles pointed out the bulldozers & trucks. But Miriam was more interested in the huge mountain of dirt they were pushing around. "Look Mommy, it's a big dirt! So I can step on it?"

Miriam: I don't WANNA take a nap! I wanna play!
Mr. Pickles: Miriam, let's play doctor. I'll be the anesthesiologist!
Miriam [whining, knowing Daddy's teasing her]: Noooooooooo!

[at a baby supply store, with smooth jazz playing overhead] Miriam: Look, music! [dancing around for a bit, then pointing to a rocking chair w/o padding] Look, dis one's yakid! ["naked"]

Miriam's new favorite movie is Mary Poppins. She has most of the songs memorized, unlike her parents who still have to flub their way through the lyrics when she requests certain songs. The other day she asked me: "Mommy, sing 'something something the steps of St. Paul'?"

Miriam's version of "Ring around the Rosie":
"Ring around the rosary, pocket full of posary..."

This evening at dinner:
rice, speaking to Miriam: Do you know where my mommy is?
Miriam: She's down my float.
rice: Oh, I better go get her.
Miriam: [gulp]

Pickle Quotes

Some backstory: when Mrs. Pickles was still a swingin' single, she and her roommates collected quotes uttered by each other that, when taken out of context, sounded really funny. When the Pickles were married, the Mrs. soon realized that the Mr. was a veritable treasure trove of funny quotes, so she continued the tradition. The Mr. insisted that the Mrs. also had her moments of wit, and she eventually made it onto the quote list on the fridge as well, followed soon after by Miriam. We're sure that Katie will be joining the ranks soon, although all she can really say so far is “Aaaaa-shrieeeeeeeeeek thbbpbpbpbp [spit spit bubble].” Note: since this represents over 4 years of Pickle Wit, this will be a long post. We also plan to add to it occasionally, so we've added a link to this post in the sidebar.

So without further ado, Quotes by The Pickles:

-Mr. P: ”It's Zeus, the God of Thunder... quick, everybody hide your wife!”
[context: sitting in a metro station, hearing the loud thunder-like rumble as a train approaches, being reminded of the philandering of said God of Thunder]

-Mr. P: ”If I were a minstrel, I'd write a song about chips & salsa... Well, maybe not – but it seemed like a good idea at the time.”

-Mr. P: ”It's like swimming in an ocean – only fuzzier.”
[context: the nickname for Mr. Pickles' big fleece sweatshirt, “fuzzy ocean,” is born]

-Mrs. P: ”This is the second time today that I've smelled an elephant.”
[context: in a metro station, Mrs. P smelled... something. (an elephant!) (duh)]

-Mr. P: “You know, I was thinking – if Forrest Gump had run with scissors in his hands, would people have followed him anyway?”

-Mr. P: “Sorry – I had a Garfield moment.”
[context: Mr. P considering pushing his innocent, helpless wife off the bed]

-Mrs. P: “I like my food to scream in agony.”
[context: Mrs. P removing her steaming food from the microwave. I must be part Kzin (sp?)]

-Mr. P: “Once our children have approached 'slave age'...”
[context: discussion of when it's appropriate to expect kids to help around the house]

-Mr. P: “Now it is time for TOES OF NO MERCY!!”
[context, w/commentary: tickle death match battle (during which Mr. P refused to admit defeat!!) (of course, because I CAN NOT be defeated -Mr. P) (oh, whatever! -Mrs. P)]

-Mr. P: “I know! Let's take out a loan for a ridiculous amount of money that we can never afford to pay back, buy one of those ornate houses on Seminary Road, party with high society as we look down upon our old friends with an air of superiority as we live fast and die young!”
[context: Mrs. P innocently asking in 2001 where we should live next. We actually ended up in a modest 1-bedroom apt. Sigh.]

-Mrs P: “Should we drive by the Esplanade and spit in its general direction?”
[context: Mrs. P's suggested defiance toward the pompous ambiance of a local apartment community. The place was really ridiculous – they charged an obscene amount of money for a very cramped, poorly laid out closet-sized apartment.]

-Mr. P: “It's the principle of the matter! It's all about exploiting the man!”
[context: Mr. P explaining why he should order 3 toppings on a pizza instead of 2 when it wouldn't cost any extra]

-Mr. P: “If I had a file, I could sharpen my toenails. Then I could cut meat with them.”

-Mr. P, soon after: “That's just BIZARRE! I can't believe I SAID that. Well... actually...”

-Mr. P: “So, tell me about yourself.”
Mrs. P: “I am an Amazon Princess.”
[context: a “normal” conversation in the Pickles' household]

-Mrs. P: “You know, there are solutions to foot odor.”
Mr. P: “Yeah, peg legs.”
[context: Mr. P's solution to personal hygiene problems]

-Mrs. P: “Men are so refreshingly barbaric sometimes.”
[wish I'd written down the context for this one!]

-Mr. P: “Yo, Mama with a death wish, SLOW! Dig?”
[context: Mr. P's much more creative suggestion for altering a traffic sign on a steep incline]

-Mr. P: “I figured I'd better kiss you before you sucked your face inside out.”
[context: after Mrs. P's marathon puckering session]

-Mr. P: “I'm so condensed I'm going to turn into a black hole.”
[context: Mr. P curling up on the loveseat]

-Mrs. P: “Never get into a battle with a superior posterior.”
[context: after giving Mr. P a hip check that sent him across the room]

-Mr. P: “My life desperately needs a good action sequence. With lots of explosions.”
[context: an evidently mundane commute to work]

-Mr. P: ”I'm glad I'm feeding at the government trough.”
[context: Mr. P on job security]

-Mrs. P: “Why don't you eat something? It will give your stomach something to think about.”
Mr. P: “That would be a good idea – right now my stomach's thinking about atheistic humanism so it's all angry and depressed.”

-Mrs. P: “A noble beast, the vegetable.”
[context: after consuming a yummy bowl of vegetable soup. I blame Dad B's influence for this one.]

-Mr. P: “Here's a tip for you, Miriam: never trust a German Shepherd with a rocket launcher.”
[context: Mr. P giving some... er, “advice” to Miriam (while playing Medal of Honor)]

-Mrs. P: “It's a terrible life when your entire purpose is to be puked on.”
[context: comment on the essence of a burp cloth]

-Mrs. P: “Alright, Miriam, let's go suction your brains out.”
[context: using one of those rubber suction thingies on Miriam's stuffy nose when she had a cold]

-”The spirit is willing, but the flesh is in zombie-mode.”
[not sure who uttered this – could have been either of us. one of our fav mottoes]

-Mr. P: “Does that look like a 'colonial' townhouse to you?”
Mrs. P: “No, it's more like a 'victim of 70's minimalist architecture' townhouse.”
[context: looking at a particularly ugly townhouse during the Great House Hunt]

-Mr. P: “All I need to do is find the proper transformation so that she'll become a recognizable probability distribution function. Then I'll know the solution and be able to get her back to sleep..., where am I?”
[context: Mr. P ACTUALLY THINKING this at 2:00 am, trying to get Miriam back to sleep – a sign that he'd been studying too much probability theory before bed]

-Mr. P: ”Miriam, let's play a new game. It's called 'twirl till we puke.'”
[context: Mr. P's idea of a fun game to play after dinner]

-Mrs. P, to Miriam: “Did you bite the fairy in half?”
[context: Miriam was having a long, drawn-out, babbling conversation with what I can only assume was a fairy, which stopped abruptly]

-Mrs. P: “Grunt, grunt. Grog like loud music.”
[context: mocking stereo speaker's instructions to “turn down volume if you hear distortion” -- as if we weren't advanced enough to figure that out for ourselves]

-Mr. P: “Basic rule of video games, Miriam: if it moves, then blow it up.”
[context: Mr. P's important advice to Miriam -- something every girl should know]

-Mr. P: “Bees like clover. Cows like clover too.”
Mr. and Mrs. P, smirking: “Everybody likes clover.”
[context: paraphrasing a line from Miriam's once-fav “The Toddler's Potty Book”: “Mommy's happy. Daddy's happy. Grandma and Grandpa are happy too. Everybody's happy.”]

-Mr. P, grabbing his tools: “Okay, Miriam, let's go break stuff.”
Miriam: “I want to break stuff too!”
[Miriam was in the fun parrot stage]

-Mr. P: “Some days, the stack wins.”
[context: Mr. P referring to his lack of desire to battle the stack of dishes in the sink. another fav motto]

-Mrs. P: “I'd rather be a woman than have to deal with one.”
[needs no comment]

-Miriam, all in one breath: “I like bagels kabuzz I don't like spiders I like Pink Panthers.”
[context: Miriam in conversation with her baby doll. and that's all the explanation you're going to get]

-Miriam: “When I was a li'l baby, I got mawwied.”
[Miriam apparently had an active night life when she was an infant]

-Mr. P: "Hi, Katie Bear!"
Miriam: "Katie's a fuzzy bear."
Mr. P: "Are YOU a bear, Miriam?"
Miriam: "No, I'm a MONKEY!"

-Miriam: "Daddy, I need a life!"
[life = knife]

-Miriam: "Aw, nuts! I forgot the man with the gun."
[we think this is funnier unexplained]

-Miriam: "Mommy, are you Ge-ne-nieve just like the doggie?"
[in Madeline's Rescue, a dog named Genevieve saves Madeline from a watery grave]

-Miriam, laughing: "Look, the TV's wrinkly!"
[there were streaks in the dust from little fingers, which, I must say, did make it look wrinkly!]

-Miriam: "*gasp* Katie's eating my Uncle Phil!"
[to entertain herself in her carseat, Katie was chewing on a laminated picture of Uncle Phil. We both cracked up when we heard Miriam exclaim from the backseat]

-Miriam, while making the Sign of the Cross after Grace: "My Son is hiding."
[she still wears a large bib for dinner, which, apparently, covers her Son!]

-Miriam: "Daddy, you're the most goover in the whole world!!"
["goover" = goober, or one who teases. This quote needs no context b/c it could refer to almost any action of Mr. Pickles' towards Miriam]

-Katie, after passing gas: "Burp! From my heinie!"
[kids are so cute when they're being gross]

-Katie, after falling down: "Daddy, will you kiss my heinie?"
[she's a firm believer in the kiss-it-and-make-it-better philosophy]

-Katie: "I'm not a pwintheth, I'm just a Katie"

-Katie, on the difference between boys and girls: "Boys have a peanut, and girls have a oval!"

Katie update

Having mastered the subtle science and exact art of raspberry blowing (she regularly soaks her shirts and covers her face in foam), Katie has moved on to the magical, wonderful and exciting world of...



TOES!!!

The Girls at home

Mr. Pickles got this cute more-or-less candid shot. I'm just impressed he actually got both the girls to look at him at the same time! :)

Big 3rd Birthday Bash

Miriam turned 3 last week. I can't believe my baby's 3 already! Although when asked how old she is, Miriam replies, "I'm fwee." (Well, not for 15 years, yet, kid.) :)

Here are some pics from the natal day festivities:



We gave Miriam our present to her right after breakfast. Alright, we admit we're cheap: it's a Fisher Price dollhouse I used and loved (and colored on) about 100 years ago. But it's still in fairly decent shape (the foam on the beds had pretty much disintegrated though). This was absolutely the smartest thing we could have done: while we were getting ready for the party, Miriam spent over and hour playing with it, instead of constantly bugging us.



Enjoying her spoils.

We had a joint party with cousin Edy and a couple other little friends. We followed the rule of age of birthday = # of friends. That was perfect. There were three little girls (and a couple toddlers) running around and giggling the whole time. Much cuteness.


Here are the birthday girls attempting to blow out the candles. Let's just say it's a good thing neither of them was sick.



The birthday girls -- best friends



Miriam looking cool in her new shades. She still talks about the pair that we lost on the airplane last summer. These come just in time for the sunny spring days!
The other day she asked to bring her shades to the store with us, and I said yes. However, she forgot to pick them up, and didn't remember until just as we were pulling into the parking lot. She spent the next 5 minutes wailing that she wanted them. Are all little girls such drama queens? Mom B, was I?

The party was great fun. I kid you not, as soon as everyone left, we all headed up to bed for a family nap. :)